Step 14: Vegas to Aspen

Las Vegas  Aspen


We were tired when we woke up. We tried to extend our stay for 1 more night but the hotel was full. We tried to make a late checkout but they needed to get in the room to turn it over for the next guest. Internet was available in the room for $12 an hour…ridiculous…so I couldn’t look for another room for us to check into and calling around was too much hassle. So, we packed.

Once packed we decided to make use of every second until check out so we headed down to the pool. It was just opening and we scored some of the only lawn chairs in the sun. Two ladies pulled some chairs up next to us and soon (despite their cigarette smoking) we’d struck up a friendship with them. They were very interesting ladies. Both about Mom’s age or a little younger-- they were lesbians who loved to take their holidays in Vegas. One of the women had a family with a man when she was in her 20’s and her kids were about my age. They told us all about their lives, finding themselves, their beliefs; I shared book recommendations, life stories. It was a great morning chat!

After about an hour and 1/2 Mom and I went back to the room and grabbed our stuff. Back in the car Mom started the drive on 15 out of Las Vegas but about 40 minutes later confessed she was too tired to drive so I took over. Mom slept, I drove. Mom drove, I slept. And it went on like this for the next 10 hours. We stopped a few times for food, rest, and photos but we were both pretty ready to get back home.

View from Utah looking at the beautiful Mountains I call home

We rolled into 15 Lazy Glen at about 11pm, Friday April, 2nd.
This house was new to me. The address is the same as the address I’d grown up in since I was about 10 years old, but the house was different. Right before I’d left for Japan I saw the delivery of the 2 halves of my parent’s new home but I’d never seen it put together, furnished, or lived in. I had seen pictures and heard all about it, but no description had accurately described what luxury my parents had moved into. I am so happy for them! Their home is really a masterpiece!

Day before I left for Japan...Dennis, Mom, and Dad with the house last time I'd been at 15 Lazy Glen

My dad was there waiting for us and welcomed me home with tears; tears just like the ones he’d cried when he’d said goodbye to me 17 months ago. It was so wonderful to see him and feel his welcoming arms around me. Nica, my parent’s dog, was also happy to see me; but it reminded me of the recent loss of our other dog- Ragua- and I was sad to not have him there with us . We were exhausted and my parents settled me into the guest room. There no longer is a ‘my’ room in the house and that is a strange and somewhat sad thing to realize…even at 27 years old.
But I crawled into bed, and with familiar furnishings, familiar art work, and familiar smells all around me, I felt truly at home in my parents house and quickly fell into a peaceful sleep.

Step 13: Headed to Vegas Baby!

Bakersfield-->Las Vegas
We woke in Bakersfield at around 7am and made use of the free internet and free breakfast. We looked online for rooms in Las Vegas. There were plenty of last minute deals but my mom was set on staying at a place called ‘The Golden Nugget” via a review of the place she’d heard from a friend. With a $39 rate we booked it and got on the road.

We headed out on 58 which eventually lead us to Barstow and the major Hwy 15. Somewhere between Barstow and Las Vegas we came upon what seemed to be some sort of oil rig graveyard, but in fact was the rigs were working away. Pretty eerie sight actually; looked straight out of some technical tragedy movie. Of course we had to stop to get a few photos.

Just outside of Vegas is a welcome center, an outlet mall, and the first few casinos. One in particular stood out to me as we pulled off the hwy. It was my friend Kate’s 13th birthday; and her wild mama Mona was taking herself, Kate, and three of her friends to L.A. to see the band her current boyfriend was in, The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band. I was one of those friends. We drove from Aspen and spent the first night at Buffalo Bill’s Resort & Casino and headed to L.A. the next day.
http://www.primmvalleyresorts.com/hotel_buffalobill.php

As soon as I saw the giant sign all of those memories from that trip flooded back to me. What a wild and fun trip that was—and Kate had been one of my few friends who had really made an effort to keep in touch with me while I was in Japan. I was excited that I would be seeing her soon. Mom and I went into the welcome center to collect coupons and walked around the outlet mall for a while, leaving with tasteful Easter baskets for my dad and sister. We ate lunch on the rear end of the car out of our cooler-- which was still stocked with random Trader Joe’s goodies.

We then headed towards the hotel. ‘The Golden Nugget’ is in the older part of Las Vegas, not directly on the new strip; but when we arrived there was a huge line at the reception desk so I found a place on the floor with our bags while Mom waited it out in the line. Both of us wanted to ‘do’ something with our Vegas night…but we didn’t know what. We’d read about shows and such that were going on, but no one thing yelled out to us.

The main reason my mom wanted to stay at ‘The Golden Nugget’ was for the pool that she’d heard was so great. So, once in our room and settled down, we headed straight there. And it was really beautiful—but it was also quite chilly and crowded. Instead of fighting our way into the hot tub we laid back in the chilly sun and relaxed on the roof top chairs while everyone around us frantically watched a movie scene being filmed on the street below. Every few minutes we would hear a car crashing and shouts from the scene below.
http://www.goldennugget.com/home.asp

The typical Las Vegas sighting...old lady gambling at the Golden Nugget

After that we headed back to the room and got ready for our night on the strip. We headed to the bus stop where we waited for the bus number we’d been told to take. But when another bus rolled up and a young girl shouted out to us to get on and quickly explained that this was a free bus we jumped on it. We sat with her and her crew as they explained that this bus was an experimental express service they were running for free. We’d lucked out; Not only was it free, but it was an express. The bus ride was damn entertaining as well with the girl and her group.


When we made it to the strip and there started our long night. We walked through loads of Casino’s—always keeping our eye open for a show or something we might want to ‘do.’ But nothing really seemed to hit the spot. We finally ended up in, of all places, an Asian restaurant in Caesar’s Palace for our dinner. Giving up hope of finding a show, we made it our goal to just find cool things to take pictures of.

Blues Brothers on the Vegas strip.

By about 9:30pm my mom was near to being ready to hit the bed…but I wasn’t letting that happen. In order for her to pep up she ordered a $12 shot of Patron but knew that wouldn’t be enough to keep her going. So we headed to a bottle shop where she purchased a small bottle of Patron and a bottle of orangina soda. I got her a cup from Starbucks and she was ready to keep going.

Mom with her energy pill--tequila!

The rest of the night we spent walking, watching the free spectacles that go on there with every corner you take, taking loads of pictures, and just laughing our asses off. It was a blast. I’d heard somewhere the Cher was playing in Vegas, and when we saw a giant Cher sign we both assumed she was playing. We ran to the ticket window only to find out she’d be there 4 days later. Mom was disappointed. We’d finally found the thing we both would want to do…but we were 4 days too early.

Getting what little bit of Cher I can

Oh well…we kept on and found ourselves in the middle of a line to enter a club called ‘TAO’ which is inside the Venetian Hotel.  http://www.taolasvegas.com/tao.html  It was the perfect place to get some great pictures of Vegas nightlife.

People waiting to get into TAO

We didn’t look quite the part and we knew we would never get in the club. In fact, we quickly caught on to how the bouncers were selecting people to enter. We watched in fascination for a good 20 minutes; Me snapping photos all the while. Maybe next time I’m in Vegas I’ll have to get dressed in the right outfit to gain admittance!

TAO entrance requirement: Bare legs and very high high heels

We continued on with our nonsense fun until about 3am and then found our free bus back to the hotel.  We were sitting next to a young gay couple and we started talking to them about what fun we were having. Mom tried to strike up a conversation with a Las Vegas local who couldn't have been rudder. Obviously the city and it's turists had gotten to him in a really bad way.  At this point, mom was ready for breakfast and luckily in Vegas you can get pretty much whatever you want at any time you want it. We got her some pancakes and eggs and then headed to bed with every part of our body exhausted--but damn was it a fun day!

Step 12: Big Sur-->Bakersfield, CA

Big Sur Day 2Bakersfield, CA
We had looked at the weather forecast last night and things didn’t look good. It was meant to rain/pour/thunderstorm all day. I was really disappointed to see that and I was hoping that the luck I’d had on the trip so far could just hold out for one more day. When we woke up it didn’t look as though my luck was going to do us any good. It was still rather dark at 8:30am and overcast with a light rain.

Sun touching down on the River

We had some snacks with us and ate a bit in the room as we packed…hopeful that the day might come around. We walked around the hotel grounds just looking around in our raincoats when suddenly we saw a ray of sunlight touch down on the river. Hallelujah!

In an art garden we walked through

Once we were packed we headed out, back onto Rt. 1. And our day consisted of stopping every 10-15 minutes to take pictures of the view or to go into one of the many art galleries/ shops that lined the road or to get out and take walks. It took us about 5 hours to go approximately 75 miles. In those 5 hours we saw some amazing art work, including Jewelry, statues, paintings, photography, pottery, and much more.

View from a gallery we stopped in

We stopped in quaint cafés; we stopped to take pictures of flowers, seals, and the cliffs.

Me in a field of wild poppies looking over Rt. 1 and the Big Sur Coast

We also did some walking through the Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park.

View of water fall in Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park

http://www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=578

The next view we spotted after our walk through to the waterfall was a massive castle on the hill. It was the Hearst Castle looking over San Simeon Bay. We drove up to the visitors center and read all about the Hearst legacy and the home. It was built between 1919 and the 1930’s for newspaper owner William Randolph Hearst. When he died the Hearst Corporation donated the property to the state of California and it has been maintained as a state park. Heart’s original words to the architect of the castle were: “I would like to build something upon the hill at San Simeon. I get tired of going up there and camping in tents. I’m getting a little too old for that. I’d like to get something that would be a little more comfortable.” Hearst Castle featured 56 bedrooms, 61 bathrooms, 19 sitting rooms, 127 acres of gardens, indoor and outdoor swimming pools, tennis courts, a movie theatre, an airfield, and the world's largest private zoo. I’d say that’s a bit more comfortable than a tent!! Hearst Castle and Hearst himself were the inspiration for one of my favorite old films: Citizen Kane.
http://www.hearstcastle.org/

View of Hearst Castle from the bay below

All of the Big Sur coast line made for a beautiful drive. One I’d love to do again with more time. I'd love to go back and spend a few days hiking, camping, perhaps backpacking through some of Big Sur's parks (outdoor ed trip in the making? I think so!)  I felt we had been truly blessed that the weather stayed nice for us to experience that create and magical place.

Wine Tasting on our way West through California

From Cambria we began to head west into California wine country. We made a few stops and then continued our slow crawl of a drive--eventually making it to Bakersfield, CA around 6pm where we checked ourselves into a hotel. We had dinner at one of the many chain restaurants that lined the hotel row. And after some relax time my mom went to bed and I headed into the nearby 24 hour fitness to get some exercise before what would be another couple of long days in the car.

Step 11: from San Francisco into Big Sur

San Francisco: headed South through Big Sur:


We all woke up early and got the car packed. Today Mom and I would begin our road trip after dropping Kathy off at the airport. Once packed we headed back to the alteration shop to pick up my dress and also went into Mojo bicycle café for some breakfast.    http://mojobicyclecafe.com/cafe.html
I love that Kathy and my mom made the road trip out to San Francisco together. They’ve known each other since they were about 10 years old and I guess in a way what I love most about it is my hope that perhaps someday I will be close with my grade school friends when I’m in my 50’s and that perhaps we will do a road trip together to pick up somebody’s kid. I just think it’s so cool.

Kathy and I haven’t always been the best of friends. In fact, for my part, I used to be pretty awful to her. I guess it was a jealousy thing most of all. When I was a kid, I hated my mom hanging out with her. But now I am just so glad that Kathy has been in my mom’s and my family’s lives all these years. She’s been a good friend to all of us.

Kathy and Mom- hugs at the airport

We dropped her off and said our goodbyes. I think those two girls had quite a lot of fun being naughty together! From there Mom and I started to head south on 101. When we first starting planning our road trip home, my mom had suggested we go through Yosemite…but after a long winter in Japan I was determined to avoid snow as much as possible. The first Jack Kerouac book I’d ever read was my senior year of high school and it was “Big Sur.” Ever since then, I’d wanted to go to, what had become in my mind, that sacred place. And so, that’s where we were headed.

We got off of the 101 and onto the old Hwy 1 in Monterey, which was where Jack was living during his escapes down into Big Sur. We were looking for historicalesq sightings on our drive through Monterey…but instead the first thing to grab our attention was the “Trader Joe’s” grocery store. Mom swerved the car through traffic to get there and we both sprinted in. For those who don’t know, Trader Joe’s is a natural grocery store similar to Whole Foods but much smaller—though with some products that are far superior to Whole Foods. For now at least, it is in only a few states so every time we are in one of those states we’ve got to stock up!  http://www.traderjoes.com/

After our shopping we got back on the road and started to head south. Along the way there were beautiful views as well as several places to stop for California fresh produce: artichokes, cherries, avocados, and more. Oh my god how I miss all of this stuff! They do not have artichokes in Japan.

Rt. 1 heading into Big Sur

The views were so gorgeous there were several times I had my mom pull over. At one point she pulled off into what was clearly a very high end neighborhood and just went with her insanely good directional senses though the neighborhood until she found a tiny little beach access path. We parked the car on the curb and headed down the trail where we arrived at this little isolated beach; we were alone besides two others. It was windy, the sand was white, and the water was crashing against the cliffs. This was the California coastline Jack had been talking about.

The Little private beach Mom found

After some time taking it in, we got back on the road and officially made our way into Big Sur. It was around 2pm and we hadn’t made a plan for the night. Initially I was going to make a reservation at a hotel, but the prices seemed unreasonable. When we saw that hotel on the side of the road we pulled over and it looked as beautiful as the website had shown. Mom went in and worked her magic. 10 minutes later we were in a lovely room at the Big Sur River Inn. http://bigsurriverinn.com/
Compared to our hotel room at the Bayside on the Wharf, this room seemed gigantic! It was sparse in a very tasteful way. No TV, nothing lavish, just a few nice framed photographs, and a feeling of peace. The hotel also has it’s own general store, a collection of eclectic shops, a restaurant, pool, and is right on a peaceful river. In the restaurant they have a nice fireplace to rest by and connect to wireless internet.
Since it was still early we decided to make the most of the rest of our day. We got back in the car and headed into Andrew Molera State Park. When we told the cute parks man at the gate that we wanted to do a hike he gave us lots of info…and since it was so late in the day (and entrance to the park cost $20) he suggested that we do a free hike outside of the park and gave us directions to the closest one.

And so, after finding the hidden trail head and parking, we headed out on Buzzard’s Roost hike. We first made our way into what we both assumed to be a scouting camp ground and realized we’d gone the wrong way, but then found the trail and headed up. Before the hike, Mom had smeared the reddest lipstick in the world on both of our lips and I swear we looked like we were straight out of Texas.

Inside a redwood with Red Lipstick

It was a lovely hike, nice and shaded. There were tons of wild orchids along the trail as well as spray painted marijuana leaves on various rocks along the way. And, per Heidi’s advice, we were careful to watch out for poison oak.

We didn’t see many people along the trail besides one couple up at the top who took a picture for us.

top of the Buzzard's Roost hike sporting our red lipstick

It was a bit hazy so our view from the top wasn’t entirely clear; we could just see the coastline in the distance. More in focus was the spray painting job that was done on a utility box at the top.

Just Passing Through

We headed back down with just enough light. Back at the hotel we showered and headed over to the restaurant for dinner. The restaurant definitely had a bbq inspired menu but lucky for me they also had a few well picked out vegetarian dishes and my mom and I both headed to bed full and happy.

The people were friendly, the feeling was relaxed, the coastline was epic; I could tell why so many artists, writers, and creators had found inspiration in Big Sur. It is a place to experience.

Step 10: San Francisco day 5

"If you have wonderful moments, don't second-guess them, just enjoy them."  Martin Short

laughing in San Fran

San Francisco day 5:

I woke up with Heidi and we had a little breakfast over a lengthy goodbye. It had been so good to spend time with her and it meant so much to me that she was the first friend I saw on my trip back to the states. We had some great talks during my time there…our friendship group seemed to be tearing apart little by little, but then suddenly a huge gash was ripped between two friends over a guy and we were trying to make sense of it. It is painful to see our years of friendship broken in such a typical way and still seems unfixable. We had a lot of other great chats about life, family, wants, love, jobs, the future, and the past. We had a big hug and she headed to work.

I finished up my packing and connected with my mom about picking me up. When she came to get me I first directed her to an alteration shop to drop off my new dress which was the perfect length for someone 6ft 5...not me at 5ft 6. After that we headed to the Bayside Inn where Kathy was just getting up and I joined them for their breakfast though I’d already eaten. It wasn’t a perfect morning weather wise, but not bad either. So after they ate, my mom and I put on our raincoats and headed out on a walk. The room at the Bayside Inn was a little too small for three people to just hang out in together. Kathy stayed behind to rest and elevate her leg.

Statue in Fort Mason

Out the door and things started becoming quite familiar. The wharf area; where I had stayed in November 2007 with Ellen (one of the other girls in our ‘group’) when we came to do our first half marathon. Starting from Aquatic Park on the Muni Pier, my mom and I decided to walk the end of the run in the opposite direction (which meant we were walking towards the golden gate bridge) and it was nice to relive those last 10 minutes of my run over a 45 minute walk. We walked through Fort Mason, along Marina Blvd, and then onto Beach St.  As with the rest of San Francisco everything was in bloom and we took it in.

Mom taking in the smell of a lovely rose

When we got back to the hotel Kathy was ready to get out of the little room herself and we hopped on a bus up to Chinatown. Frankly Chinatown was not on the top of my San Francisco list considering I’d been living in Asia for the last 17 months, but still fun to watch all the commotion, smell all the horrible fishy smells, and look at all the cheap trinkets available. We decided from there to walk towards the Ferry building but as we turned the corner out of Chinatown I spotted a Thai restaurant and we decided to head in. I wish I could tell you the name and location of that restaurant…unfortunately all I can tell you is that it’s between China town and the Ferry building and that it was delicious. Best samosas I’ve ever tasted!



We made it into the Ferry building and we all did some shopping and relaxing. I bought some kitchen stuff for friends back in Japan (they love all the cutesy kitchen stuff here!). I really like the vibe that the Ferry building creates. Kind of like an indoor laid back market space with a very eclectic range of shops.

Mom and Kathy outside Ferry Building

From the Ferry building we started walking back towards the Fisherman’s wharf area but along the way made several ‘watering hole’ stops.

Juice shots

One was in an organic restaurant where I got 3 shots of juice, my mom got 3 shots of mescal tequila, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mescal and Kathy got an organic martini.

Squeezing the lime for the mescal or mezcal

Our next stop was in a bar around Pier 23 where there was a blues/rock band playing and people were dancing. We sat at watched a woman in her 70’s with loads of plastic surgery trying to lure in every pair of eyes available (including her own in the mirror). It was pretty funny and the music was good.

(no she's not the old lady with plastic surgery!!) This is the 70 year old's dance teacher and another student

Finally we made it the Fisherman’s Wharf and we headed into Boudin’s Restaurant. Mom and Kathy had some dinner, which I passed up (seemed to be nothing without fish, cheese, or meat on the menu). http://boudinbakery.com/ Kathy was exhausted at this point, in fact we all had walked quite far and for her to do it on a freshly surgeoned knee of course she was exhausted! She headed back to the hotel and my mom and I had a little more walking before heading back to the hotel and into bed.

Good night San Francisco

Tomorrow would start the next leg of my trip through the USA.

Step 9: San Francisco day 4

San Francisco Day 4:

Before I left for Japan I was doing yoga pretty much everyday…sometimes twice a day. I had found so much healing through yoga and the cleansing practices that I learned along side my yoga. When I first arrived in Japan, having no clear idea of what I was getting myself into, I woke up on the first morning and promptly walked out of my house with the mission of familiarizing myself with the area. This meant to me: find the grocery store, find the gym, find a coffee shop, and so on. That first day I actually thought to myself that perhaps my house was outside of the actual town and that was why it seemed deserted with no shops of any kind. I was wrong. Shimukappu doesn’t have a grocery store (it has a convenience store with inconvenient hours), it doesn’t have a gym, it doesn’t have a coffee shop. Essentially, Shimukappu is a rest-stop.

I don’t know why I’m disciplined enough to go outside and run in snow storms but not disciplined enough to do yoga in my house. I guess running has always been a solitary thing for me. Sure I’ve had some training partners in the past but running is something I’m accustomed to doing alone. Yoga on the other hand I’ve always done in classes and I’ve always enjoyed the energy I gain from the people around me and inspiration I get from the teacher. Multiple times throughout my time in Japan I have tried to practice yoga. I have had my mat in the center of my house waiting for me to get on it but for some reason whenever I tried I would either end up in tears on the floor or laughing at my dog who likes to lie down right beneath my downward dog.

I had done five bikrams classes over summer vacation 2009 but that was pretty much all the yoga I had done in the last 17 months. That said, I was excited to get right back into Yoga during my time in America-- so that was where Heidi and I were headed on our bikes Sunday morning.

We arrived at Urban Flow Yoga and in our yoga clothes stood out like red dots on a grey canvas. The area wasn’t exactly yoga row and you could pick out each person who was headed into the studio quite clearly from the rest of the rather rundown street. Urban Flow Yoga is run by Rusty Wells, a man who has gained quite a following over his years as a yoga teacher. He opened Urban Flow to be a donation based yoga studio, a place where no one will be turned away for lack of funds. If they want to practice yoga, all are welcome.
http://urbanflowyoga.com/

The line to get in was out the door and we had arrived quite early. Once up the stairs we made our donations and headed in. The ‘it’s a small world’ treatment happened within moments of setting down my mat when I noticed a familiar face. I went over and gave Michael, a guy who I had practiced with regularly back in Aspen at King Yoga, a hug and hello. The studio was huge and I could tell from the energy around me that there must be something really special about to happen. I was nervous and excited.

When Rusty and his team of teachers (yes in a studio that size you would need a team!) entered the room everyone went silent. They went to the front of the room and the drums started, the chanting started, the swaying started. It was amazing. I didn’t know the words but I knew the feeling and it went through me with all of my wonderful memories from my yoga teacher training in Thailand.

Me as a dedicated yogi in 2007...Teacher Training in Thailand

It was a tough class and well taught. I knew why Rusty was so respected and why all of his students from other studios would follow him to this off the grid area of San Francisco and support him so that he could have a donation based place. We struggled, we laughed, we were assisted, and we were supported by him and his team. The class ended where it started; with music, drums, and swaying.

According to Heidi's knowledge of him, Rusty’s yoga theory is that modern yoga has to adapt to the modern practitioner. Teaching yoga in a city is much different than teaching it in a small town in India. People’s ability to relax, their ability to focus and forget is much more difficult in the city. He believes it is too much to ask city students to come into class from the streets of their crazy lives and sit in silence and breath. He designs his classes in a way I have never experienced. He opens the classes so the energy is as crazy as the lives we live with the music and drums and even going into the asanas tough right from the beginning. The practice slows the most in the middle of the class almost reaching shavasana and then begins to build speed again at the end. This way he isn’t sending his student out into the world half asleep. He believes this would be dangerous and so prepares them to reenter the crazy city with high energy.

I was sore before the class ended. I loved it.

We headed back on our bikes and ended up at Starbucks getting some breakfast and hot chocolate. The plan for the day was to meet up with Mom and Kathy a bit later for pedicures and a walk down Haight Street.

Mom behind Pipe Dreams -Haight/Ashbury

We got back to Heidi’s house and got a call from Mom. They were headed our way. After finding parking we all (including Kathy who had recently had knee surgery) walked towards the infamous intersection of Haight-Ashbury. As we came up the street and into the shop lined area there was, directly in front of us, a homeless man carrying a stuffed animal cat. My mom and I watched him for a while as he treated his cat so kindly with pet’s and whispers in the ear. He then went into a stairwell and sat down with a little comb to groom her. It was one of the more endearing things I’d ever seen.

Walking with his cat

We then continued on and found ourselves the desired manicure/pedicure shop and the Thai women got to work on the lot of us. Afterwards we window shopped and ended up in a very cool hat shop called Goorin Brothers. The Goorin Brothers is in its 4th generation of hat making with a motto of “Bold hat making since 1895.” The shop had a lounge feeling to it with couches and lovely displays; we all had some fun trying them on…but Heidi was the only one still with the hat on her head when we walked out.
http://www.goorin.com/hat-shops/san-francisco-haight-street

Relaxing in Goorin Brother's Hat Shop

Mom and Kathy came back to Heidi’s house and we found them a hotel near Fisherman’s wharf for $69 at the Bayside Inn. Not the fanciest place in town but a hop away from the wharf for $69 and clean is unbeatable!
http://baysideinnwharf.com/
They headed there and Heidi and I went on a walk of our own. We headed to the opposite end of Haight Street which isn’t quite as bustling but proved to have quite a few cool little shops. We ended up in a botique shop, along with a eccentric fashion photographer, trying on clothes. I ended up with a long purple dress and Heidi debating over a peacoat.
We made dinner at home and went to bed early saying our goodbyes. Tomorrow Heidi would go to work and I would join my Mom and Kathy.

Step 8: San Francisco day 3

San Francisco Day 3:

Heidi and I woke up to what was an absolutely gorgeous day. From what Heidi had said the sun came the day I came, and that before that it had been raining for weeks. Lucky me. We took our time getting up and decided to head to Mission Park for a lazy lie-about in the sun. Back on the bikes I followed Heidi and we ended up in a very cool area called the Mission. We parked our bikes along side the hoards of others and right there on that block corner you could really see San Francisco. That was obviously the place the locals hung out on a nice weekend day. The park was huge but it wasn’t easy to find an empty space to set ourselves up on. We headed to the top of the hill and eventually settled in. There was a beautiful view of the city from there, the landscape view and the people immediately around us made me feel like I was really getting a taste of it.

View of cute butts, I mean boys,  in Mission Park

We relaxed, used my spying lens on the new camera, watched a group of girls all dressed in their nicest little tea party dresses having a picnic gathering, watched a group of guys in their skimpiest underwear sunbathing, watched an old grouchy guy and his dog, and we chit chatted ourselves. Then we got an unexpected call from my mom. My mom and her best friend (since grade-school) Kathy had been on a road trip from Aspen to Salt Lake City to Northern California and were headed down to San Francisco to pick me up. They weren’t supposed to be in San Fran until tomorrow, but turned out they were already in Sausalito and checked into a hotel. I think my mom couldn’t wait another day to see me when she was already so close!

Looking over Mission Park, San Fran

We made plans to meet up with them for dinner. Heidi and I headed back to the house and got some stuff together. I requested we go back to Tennessee Valley for another hike so that’s what we did. The cool thing about that area is that there are so many trails that all start from the same point and we had another wonderful hike that even finished with great views of the Golden Gate Bridge (I was so pissed I’d left my camera behind for this hike!).

After the hike we headed into Sausalito and found the hotel where my mom and Kathy were staying. When we got out of the car my mom was standing a few blocks away and we made eye contact...we both started running at the same time and ended up in a laughing embrace. I nearly cried, it felt so good. The last time I’d seen my mom there was a lot of tense air that we always had to move through. To say the least, my parents did not approve of the relationship I had been in at the time and it had been a really rough patch in what was usually such a stable and supportive relationship. Since the breakup and all the emotional ups and (mostly) downs that I’d gone through while in Japan we’d really become back like normal and it felt so good to see her with the new fresh air.

Reunion with mommy!

We went up to the room and changed out of our hiking clothes and into some dinner clothes. The four of us walked the streets of Sausalito on a Saturday night and I realized how much this was something I missed. I missed getting dressed up, getting together with friends and family, having good conversation, and going out for dinner. We ended up in a little Italian restaurant called ‘Angelino’s’ and we were swiftly welcomed by our waiter. Mom and Kathy got down to their drinking while I looked over the menu for vegetarian options. Italian restraints never pose as a good option for me but it was a busy Saturday night and when they could seat us right away I wasn’t going to complain.

When the waiter came back I explained to him I was a vegan (cheese free please) and asked him which of the dishes would be easiest to alter for their kitchen. He proved to be an excellent waiter and made a few suggestions but then went back to the kitchen to consult the chef. He told me what they came up with and it sounded perfect. The other girls made their orders and we went into a lovely night of girl-talk, good food, a sweet waiter, and laughter.
http://www.angelinorestaurant.com/

The thing is-- that kind of ordering simply is not an option in Japan. In fact, going out for meals in Japan causes all sorts of stress for me and the people I’m with as I always dread having no options and the people being unwilling to help me out. In general, the idea of being a vegetarian has not caught on in Japan. Instead they seem to see it as a ‘hoity toity’ thing us westerners do and they want no part in it. The few times I have been with other people and they have requested alterations made to a dish for me the waiter will flat out refuse or make it quite clear that they are unhappy to do it.

I guess that’s why at the end of the meal I was praising the waiter so much, while my mom, Kathy and Heidi all seemed to be unphased by his willingness to go above and beyond for a customer. American’s in general are quite used to and in fact demand that the customer is always right and always gets their way- their choice. Japan is not quite the same. In fact they think that they already have the right way for everything and so suggesting something different is considered disrespectful. I have found this aspect of their culture rather infuriating and it has been a large part of my reasons for never feeling quite comfortable there. The following film has a wonderful example that the speaker had while she was in Japan in the introduction of her speech. The rest of the film is excellent as well in displaying the differences between how different countries view “choice.” But definitely take a look at the first few minutes just for the Japan example.
http://www.ted.com/talks/sheena_iyengar_on_the_art_of_choosing.html

After dinner Heidi and I headed back to her house with plans made for tomorrow with Mom and Kathy. But before bed we decided to grab some desert at a little place a few blocks from her house called 'Candybar.' Candybar is ‘San Francisco's first dessert lunge’ and had a very cool atmosphere. Funky artwork, fluffy furniture, fabulous desserts, and games! We had to wait a while to be seated but once we were we grabbed a box of connect four, made our order, and battled. Of course Heidi repeatedly kicked my ass (after all she is an engineer and I barely passed 4th grade math) but it was damn fun! Also the carrot cake and apple a la mode were very good company to our games!

http://www.candybarsf.com/

Heidi and I relaxing in the Candybar

After finishing our treats and games we walked home and crawled into bed…another exhausting but wonderful day.

Step 7: San Francisco day 2

San Francisco Day 2:


Heidi was up and off to work and we made plans to catch up later. I was still exhausted and went on back to bed. I made my way into the kitchen around 10:30 and made some breakfast with the groceries we’d gotten the day before...the yummy continues!

I decided to spend the day on foot walking from Heidi’s house -which was on the corner of Fell St and Divisadero- along Fell St Park and into Golden Gate Park. It was a beautiful day. I packed my little bag with water, snacks, and sunscreen and set off. I missed seeing the sakura in Tokyo, but as fate would have it the cherry blossoms were out and blooming right there in San Francisco along with just about every other plant that ever blossomed.

Cherry Blossoms San Fran

Spring was truly at its best. I walked and walked and enjoyed using my new camera on the conservatory of flowers, the lily ponds, the Japanese tea garden, the many lakes, and the bikers on the dirt trails until finally my feet were exhausted and I sat down for a rest.

Golden Gate Park

I looked at my watch and it was already 3:00pm. I’d made plans to meet with Heidi at about 5:30 so couldn’t rest for long. The walk back took half the time as I wasn’t snapping so many photos. I detoured up to Haight Street on my walk back to the house and got caught up in my camera once again on the variety of diverse people who lined the street that was so much a part of San Francisco’s history.

Heading up to Haight Ashbury

Back to Heidi’s house I took out the directions she had given me and rolled her extra bike out of the house and onto the street. It was my first time on a bike in about 2 years and it felt great. Following her directions through the streets of San Francisco felt natural. Biking is definitely the way to go in that city. I met Heidi downtown outside of a Wells Fargo where we exchanged some yen for me. We then walked over to the Ferry building where we saw a large number of people gathering with their bikes. We both noticed it and made a brief comment about it but continued into the Ferry building for a look around. By the time we came out of the building the number of people with bikes had tripled and it dawned on Heidi what was going on. Unbelievable we ran into some people she knew and she asked them, “Is this CRITICAL MASS?” Yep, it was.

‘Critical Mass’ is a bicycling event held on the last Friday of every month in over 300 cities around the world, however, the ride was originally founded in 1992 in San Francisco. From what I could tell it is organized by meeting at a set location and time and traveling as a group through city streets on bikes trying as hard as possible to not allow any gap big enough for a car to go through. I guess the original intent of Critical Mass was to express how bicycle unfriendly the drivers and streets of San Francisco were and this was a marked revenge to create as much of a traffic debacle as possible. And it works. Happily Heidi and I had bikes and we decided to join the ride for a while.

Not my picture...unfortunatley I didn't have my camera with me which i was totally bummed about

We’d noticed a few older naked ‘gentleman’ before the race started and they definitely gave us a laugh in their top hats and either a sock or nothing to cover their ‘bits’. Once the ride started we leisurely bike-strolled along the busiest street in San Fran and somehow ended up right next to the naked gentlemen. For the next hour no matter if we sped up or slowed down we always ended up either directly behind or inline with them. It was quite hysterical. They kept yelling out absurd comments to the people watching from the bars or stuck in traffic, like “Get naked and get a bike!” or “Get out of your cars and get naked!” The funniest part of it, however, was that inbetween their shouts they would speak to one another about business operations, the stock market, and so on. They were genuine upstanding citizens who once a month “Got naked and got on their bike!” Apparently the ride can last for hours but we ducked out and headed to meet up with a family friend of Heidi’s who was having a birthday dinner for his step-daughter.

We met up with Alex (who has since turned out to be an excellent resource of information on self-publishing and various other subjects) and his family at ‘Limon’ a Peruvian Restaurant on Valencia Street—in the middle of the Mission area. Let me just say that if you are ever in San Francisco you have GOT to go here! The company, service, and food made for a wonderful meal. ‘Limon’ has been voted as one of San Francisco’s top 100 restaurants, and in a city like that…I think that is saying a lot…but well deserved. They are famous for their rotisserie chicken but even a vegetarian like myself had no problem filling up. The lovely salads, quinoa and roasted vegetables, coconut fried rice, plantains, turnips, and sweet potato fries all were delicious.
http://www.limon-sf.com/

10:30pm and back on our bikes headed home; It was another great day in that great city.

Step 6: San Francisco Day 1

March 25th 2010 continues…USA time.

After an eight hour flight I arrived into San Francisco at roughly 10:30am on March 25th. It’s kinda nice traveling from Japan to USA because you don’t actually lose a day of vacation. The same day is still happening and basically just starting. I started my day in Japan at 3:30am on March 25 and arrived into San Francisco at 10:30am the same day…cool.

After retrieving my massive amounts of luggage I found myself a pay phone and called my friend Heidi. Heidi and I grew up together in Aspen. We probably met in the red brick gym on the gymnastics mat when we were about 6 years old. We did gymnastics together for about six years though she was always better than me so usually in a different level. We had for many years shared a mutual best friend and then in high school shared the same group of best friends. Even though we were in the same ‘group’ and had done a trip our last year of high school together up to the Teton Mountains --we had never really bonded just she and I. But as I started to plan my trip home I decided to make San Francisco and Heidi my first stop and I was excited to spend some time alone with her for the first time.

Heidi worked in San Francisco as an energy consultant. Yep, she’s a smart chic. In university she was one of about ten females in her engineering major. She’s also the girl who every guy falls in love with but she never seems to fall in return. I think she simply doesn’t 'seem' to let guys get to her the way most of us girls do.

Heidi picked up the phone and in an excited squeal with both were talking over one another. Then suddenly she said, “Jaz, I gotta go. Call me back. I’m being pulled over.” And she hung up. Shit. I sat in the little pay phone booth for about 10 minutes not sure how long the ticket process would take all the time wondering what had happened. I called back a couple times before she answered. Turns out there is a very strict ‘no cell phone while driving’ law in California and where better than to catch and enforce this rule but right near the pick up area of the airport where people are of course gonna be answering their cell phones. Damn! What a way to start the day and not only that but it was Heidi’s first time ever being pulled over!! Ahh. So sorry Heidi!!

She picked me up in her diesel run VW jetta, gave me my first USA hug, and we were off headed back to her place on Fell St. Heidi lived in a typical San Francisco style house with three other people who she kinda knew. It was a big house with a nice new kitchen but everything else in the house seemed original to the house. I liked it. It was a lovely day; Heidi had taken the day off and since we already had the car out we decided to head over the bridge towards Sausalito and get some lunch and go on a hike. It was heaven going into the restaurant and seeing the English menu board with multiple vegetarian options of all variety—I wanted them all. I ended up with a brown rice, pineapple, tofu dish and it was delicious.

We then headed to an area called Tennessee Valley which is within the Golden Gate National Recreation Area. It was so gorgeous and it just felt great to be out hiking with her like we had so many times in the past with our friends in Colorado. The outdoors and exercise are definitely a theme that runs through our friendship group but of the girls Heidi is probably the most fit. I, on-the-other-hand, had lost quite a bit of fitness in the last 17 months and was struggling to keep up with her.

Heidi on Tennessee Valley trail...holding her neck to hide her poison oak attack!

It was a lovely way to start my time back in the USA. The things I missed most about home were happening all in one day. Good food, good friend, fun life. The only thing missing was family... but that would be coming a few days later!

Since we were so close, we decided to go over to Sausalito and walk around for a little while. We window shopped and relaxed over some ice-cream.

Heidi fighting off the wind in Sausalito with a smile

We decided to make dinner so went to a grocery store. It wasn’t a Whole Foods, but it was another version of it that they have in San Francisco. I was OVERWHELMED! I honestly felt I was having a mini panic attack of some kind. I couldn't believe it. They had everything! I’d forgotten how lucky we are in the USA when it comes to produce. Where I live in Japan food comes as it can with the crops. The only fresh produce you can get year round are onions, carrots, bananas and cabbage. Everything else, when it comes, costs a fortune. And so most of my vegetables and fruits come frozen and even then they are very expensive.

I was in awe seeing all of that food looking so fresh and affordable. Let me give you an example of Japanese costs for produce: A small (as in mini) watermelon in the summer costs about $15.00. A small bag of cherries costs about $8.00. 4 apples cost $6.00. 1 small head of broccoli costs $2.00. It’s crazy. Meat and Fish on the other hand (neither of which I eat) are relatively cheap and always available. There I was in the grocery store with my jaw on the floor so Heidi basically had to drag me threw the aisles.

At this point I was exhausted. I had been awake for roughly 29 hours. We made a light dinner and crawled into her bed together around 10pm like little girls on a sleep over. It was peaceful and I felt at home for the first time in far too long.

Step 5. From Shimukappu to Tokyo Narita

March 25th 2010…


The alarm went off at around 3:30am and up we got. Kindly, Yohei had offered to take me to the airport at that ungodly hour. Shimukappu is about a two hour drive away from the airport and my flight to Tokyo left at 7am. After brushing the newly fallen snow off his car we headed to the airport. It was going to be a long day. The last couple of days I had been planning out my lay over time in Tokyo—which was about 9 hours long. March 25th is prime ‘sakura viewing’ time in Tokyo; meaning the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I had seen the sakura in Hokkaido (the island I live on) in May 2009 but from what I understood the flowers in Honshu (the island where Tokyo is located) are truly spectacular. With the help of a few people I had mapped out train times and the best places to go see these amazing flowering trees instead of wasting away in the Tokyo airport.

Maya with the sakura trees of Hokkaido

The Japanese see the sakura tree as symbolic to life. Because the tree flowers for such a short period of time it is important to always have your eyes aware to the moment they open. One must treasure them while they last because if you don’t today they might be gone tomorrow. There is truly a sakura obsession in this country! People travel all over Japan to see them; they start blooming in the south in early March and move north until finally Hokkaido blooms in mid May. There are actually people who arrange their holidays around this…and apparently I was one of them.

Sakura tree outside the Sapporo Beer Factory

After saying goodbye to Maya and Yohei I got on the plane to Tokyo. Armed with my maps and timetables I could see as soon as we landed that today might be the worst for sakura viewing. It was POURING rain and foggy. It was 9:15am and my flight for America wasn’t leaving until 5:45pm…hmmm. The frugal person I am decided to save my money for home and spend the hours at the airport. I had a lot of luggage and a lot of time to kill. Thankfully one of my Rollins professors turned friend (Jill Jones) had recently suggested a book for me. DUNE. Reading, window shopping through Tokyo Narita’s vast airport shopping, the occasional sleepy doze, and people watching filled in the hours.

One particular people watching exchange that both saddened and fascinated me was between a tiny little Japanese airline representative and a robustly tall and infuriated Australian man. It seemed the cause of the problem was something over someone in his party not having a booked ticket. As is usual in Japan I am certain the woman was doing all she could to get to the bottom of the issue, however she also was going to follow all of the proper procedures and rules. He, on-the-other-hand, was going to do what has become known to him to get his way which is yell and berate her as loudly and publicly as he possibly could. What the man didn’t know is that yelling isn’t as highly regarded here in Japan as it is in other parts of the world. And I had to laugh a bit at his misunderstanding even though I felt quite terrible for her.

Here's a bit of Japanese cultural information for you from JB Intercultural Consulting:

In Japan everyone has two faces:
"Tatemae" is your public face, the opinions and actions that are appropriate to your position and role.
"Hon-ne" is one's personal opinion or feeling.

Where Americans and other westerners usually feel a person is insincere or outright lying if these two do not match, Japanese tend to see the ability to keep your personal feelings and interests separate from your public role as a sign of maturity. Playing one's role, even if privately you disagree with the policies or actions that you are required to uphold, is usually considered honorable rather than hypocritical.

Conflict within groups is managed through:
1. Hierarchy (age, gender, position).
2. Using intermediaries and indirect methods of communication.
3. Enormous amounts of energy put into behaving appropriately in human relationships, maintaining them through gifts, favors, creating powerful mutual obligations.
4. Stigma and penalties for those who raise questions, who are not sufficiently "cooperative."
http://www.culture-at-work.com/contents.html#japan

Here’s a little something I’ve learned while in Japan. There is one right way to do almost everything. And that one way is the path the majority of Japanese people will take. Asking for an exception is unacceptable and frowned upon when done. Suggesting a new and (in your own opinion) better way to do something may be listened to politely but will likely change nothing (especially if your an American 27 year old female who doesn't play all the games). On top of that, yelling is simply not a means of communication here. In fact, if something’s really important…they often lower the voices to a near whisper.

I felt sorry for them both; she was simply trying to do her job the best way she knew how while staying inside the strict lines she felt safe in and he was simply responding to an inconvenient situation in a way he was used to getting results with. As for me, I figured it was western culture reintroduction right there in the Tokyo airport. I wondered, am I ready for this?  And with a smile I thought to myself...definitely!

Step 4: Going back a ways

Today marks the beginning of the end of what was a fabulously long and wonderful spring into summer holiday season. Thinking about having to go back to work tomorrow has me reflecting on the past five months of amazing memories. It all started back on a snowy day here in Shimukappu, Japan March 25th when I made my way to the airport in Sapporo and headed back to the USA for the first time in 17 months. Basically, I have been on a non-stop pleasure cruise ever since which has taken me all over the USA seeing family, friends, teachers, and beautiful places…back to summer-time in Japan where (despite having to work from June 2-July 22) the living is easy and I’ve been enjoying festivals, beach-time, a hike up a little mountain called Mt. Fuji, and even going to Japanese school. But now it’s August 14 and I’ve got to go back to work and transition into fall before another, dreaded, Japanese winter sets in.

Before that, however, I want to go back and share some of the details on the beginning of my time in Japan and then my spring into summer holiday season. Luckily I was journaling through much of this time so hopefully won’t forget too many of the fun details.


So, let’s start from the very beginning.


I left America for Japan on November 6th, 2008. It was an emotional departure to say the least and one that I knew was happening both for all the wrong reasons and for the right ones that I wasn’t even aware of yet. Between November 2008 and March 25th 2010 a lot happened in the emotional, physical, and sensational roller coaster of a life that I live. I arrived in a town I had an entirely different expectation for “expectation can only lead to disappointment’ and my first 2 months here were lived out feeling both deceived and lied to. I didn’t think I would survive it.  

My house in Shimukappu. buried by the snow.

On top of that the man who I’d been in a long distance relationship with for nearly 2 years arrived into the blizzard and endless white of a winter that is Shimukappu, Japan. The same destructive relationship we’d always had resumed and when the realization hit that I couldn’t fix him from all his pain I let him go from my life. It was then that I had to look into the face of being truly alone in a country I didn’t know the language, I didn’t feel any connection with it’s people, in a town of 1000, with no grocery store, restaurant, or café to escape in. Everyday I wanted to go home. All the things I loved about myself as a person were being stripped away. I’ve always respected myself for my independence but here I am co-dependent on others for almost everything. I’ve always respected my strong opinions, but here my opinions were silenced by being ignored. I became needy on my family. I became obsessed with keeping my friendships from home alive. I became aware of my dependence on a gym or a yoga class to keep me fit and found it hard to motivate myself everyday to get out on the same snowy road for my runs.

A very well plowed day on the road that I run

Thank god for my dog who arrived in March and reminded me to get up every morning. Also thank god for Chisato, who moved to Shimukappu that April as the new math teacher and quickly became my only real friend here. I was homesick everyday, but little by little I was more able to cope with where I was. One year into my 18 month contract, I had only been hugged twice: once by Chisato and once by my American friend Jenny who I travelled to Kyoto and Hiroshima with in September. For a touchy feely hugger like myself this was torture. One thing that happened that helped me finally feel more apart of the community was on the night that a group of people I had regularly been playing basketball with all transported together to Sapporo to watch Hokkaido’s Basketball team ‘Rera Kamuy’ play a game.

After the game

The teams name, Rera Kamuy, comes from the language of the Ainu, an ethnic group indigenous to Hokkaido, and means "god of the winds". Before the game we’d gone to dinner at a vegetarian restaurant they had found out about just for me and they all did their best to look satisfied by the food. It was a great game and we had a lot of fun but it was after the game-- in a karaoke joint where we all sang countless Beatles songs -- that I felt I had finally gained some ground with this group of people who I’d been both playing basketball with and teaching English to for over a year. It was a great feeling. I’d been missing that connection with people for so long and I needed that night to happen to help me see them a bit more clearly and not with so much judgment.

The very next morning, exhausted though I was, I went to play in a community soccer tournament. I recognized all the same faces from my small town and, as per usual, no one came up to me to greet me or say hello. I’d become quite used to being ignored despite knowing that every single person in the town knew my name. I was sitting on the stage of the gym stretching when suddenly someone plopped down besides me and said, in perfectly Australian accented English, “hey, how ya’ going’?” I turned to face him and looked upon a man I’d never seen. What I’d come to be familiar with about Japanese people and their reserved natures, especially when it comes to acceptance and letting people in, he seemed to have none of. I could tell from that first instant that he was something very different than what I’d become so accustomed to here in Japan. From that moment on Yohei has become the main attraction of my life here in Japan and I thank him for sharing his amazing soul with me here.

Yohei and Maya bonding...despite Yohei being allergic to Maya they love each other.

Combined with my experience that night going to the basketball and the next day meeting Yohei I finally had something good to say about the country I’d been living in for the past year. And when, soon after, I was confronted by my bosses about renewing my contract I had some hard thinking to do. I missed my family, Colorado, my friends, Americans in general, and health food stores. But with no job waiting for me at home and no solid decision on what I wanted to do, I decided to give Japan one more go around... but only if they would let me have 2 months off first. They agreed and the planning began on what would become my fabulous 2 months travelling in the USA.